The Day My Pen Ran Out Of Ink…

My pen ran out of ink!!! No! Really! I’m serious!!
My pen… RAN… OUT… of… INK!!

Top pen shows some ink still available. Bottom pen is E-M-P-T-Y!!!

Lately I have been obsessed with writing. Daily Journal writing helps me to ‘think through’ problems and issues. Grocery lists make sure I get home with everything I need. Condolences, Birthday Greetings, Thank you cards and more keep my hand moving along the paper. I have found that a lot of my book and blog writing is first done on paper too. Writing by hand slows my brain down so I can think while I write. I am amazed at how many times I change a word in my mind from the moment I think of the sentence until the time it shows up on the paper. Going the ‘old fashion’ route isn’t as frustrating either. No red or green squiggly lines show up and tell me how uneducated I am.

I don’t think I have ever written so much in my life that a pen actually ran dry. With no warning either. One minute words were flowing easily off the pen tip, and the next… nothing. See?

Clear writing… then BOOM, no ink. I had to search for another pen IN THE DARK to finish my thought. UGH!

Who knew this was possible??? Obviously quite a few people must be aware of this issue because look… It’s an advertising feature. I’m astonished!

Whoa… 40% Longer! How long is it 40% longer than??

I have been around the block for quite a few years. Once we were allowed to use an ink pen instead of a pencil, around fourth grade I think, I never looked back. Pen was my writing utensil of choice. I clearly remember my friend Mary pressing down so hard when she wrote, her paper curled at the edges. I wanted to be just like her… but my hand hurt after only two pages, so I gave up.

In my younger years Bic was my ‘go to’ pen. Blue Ink, medium point. It blobbed and leaked ruining my purse linings, but I didn’t know any better. The tips were made of metal back then and if your pen skipped you simply heated the tip with a match and the ink began to flow again. Eventually the Bic company switched to a plastic tip and then you only ruined your pen. As I got older I moved on to black ink, fine point. Then I hit my ‘creative stride’ and wrote in multi-color (mostly hot pink) gel pens. I have grown to full adulthood and have settled on an inexpensive PaperMate Profile. It feels comfortable in my hand and glides across the paper as easy as a greased pig.

Over the years I have received pen ‘awards’… you know, those Cross Pen and Pencil sets held in a wooden case with an engraved plaque stuck to the top. Those pens are never use, just there for show. I wonder how much ink are in them? I will never know. Every time I have tried to use it the ink was already dried up.

I have given pens as gifts too. For example, I bought my son-in-law ‘to be’ a Mont Blanc as a college graduation gift. I know he has lost… and found it a few times. No clue if he still has it. However, picking it out for him was fun. I stood in the store at Bridgewater Commons and wrote his name over and over again with different pens until… BINGO! One pen felt so comfortable, and his name seemed to effortlessly flow as if the pen knew it was going to belong to him. It is NOT the pen I would have chosen had I not scribbled with it. The pen picked me, I didn’t pick it.

I don’t know about you… but pens don’t normally stay in my possession long enough for me to realize there is a finite amount of gooey ink. I leave them on counters, lose them at the bottom of my purse, pack them away in boxes, leave them in my car, and hand them to needy strangers in the Department of Motor Vehicle lines… which of course they ‘forget’ to return. That’s OK, I don’t mind. In the cold and flu season germs are every where and it’s best not to use ‘community’ pens or share yours.

The major problem I have with pens, is just like policemen… they are never around when you need one. In a pinch I have been known to jot a phone number down with lipstick, nail polish, and a burnt stick. Once I even signed a document with grape juice and a toothpick. Hey… the document was going to be faxed… the recipient would never know!

Now that I know running out of ink MIGHT become a problem in the future I will be more diligent when making a purchase. I wonder if any company has thought about installing a fuel gauge on the barrel giving you the option to switch your pen before you run out?

If you think I am obsessed about pens… wait until you read my future blog about scissors! I could probably write a book entirely on them! Don’t get me started!!! Geesh!

First Person? Third Person?

Okay… one of the very first questions I have in writing this book is… which person do I choose to write it in?

Most memoirs are written in FIRST PERSON, using pronouns like I, Me, We, Us. The author is the story teller and you as a reader understand that. The events did happen to them after all.

However… because I have PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) most of the events that happened in my life I feel were not happening to me. I was removed from the situation. I felt no emotion. It was kind of like watching a scary movie where you constantly repeat to yourself… “This is only make believe. It’s not really happening. It’s fake. Stan is going to get up out of that bed and laugh at me”. Therefore I think writing the book in the THIRD PERSON using pronouns like, she, her, he, him, it, they, and them would be more fitting with the telling of my story.

As I later learned through therapy, feeling like you are on the ‘outside looking in’ is common for us PTSDers. It’s our way of coping with trauma. I can’t remember when I began thinking that way… but I can tell you when I stopped. I stopped a year after my husband’s death… when a good friend convinced me that going on medication to give me a base to use during therapy to cope with it all would be a smart thing. I took his advice and was glad I did. I finally started to make progress in therapy, and in life. Things have shifted once again… and I’m on the outside once more looking in. However this time I understand it… I know I’m doing it… which makes it easier to deal with.

What do YOU think… should I write in FIRST PERSON or THIRD? Do you have a preference when reading a book?